Jadis was such a fucking lucky idiot.
Kerr had never known anyone in her whole life who had managed to get herself into and then out of trouble so frequently. How in Valtar’s hairy nipples does a person pick a fight with Noll the Savage and then walk away unmaimed. No, not just unmaimed, but with a promise from the old wolf to give her some combat lessons! How!? It had to be fucking divine intervention!
Actually, now that she thought about it, a little bit of intervento divino was actually likely. The Big D was apparently hovering over her shoulder—or rather, shoulders—and doing only the gods knew what to her fate. Every strange encounter, every freakish situation that the “reincarnated soul”, whatever that was, had smashed headfirst into could have been influenced by that god of mischief and lies. Of course, the priests always assured everyone that no god could directly influence shit on the mortal world, that was the whole point of The Covenant. But come on, how was she supposed to believe that the gods, with all that power, never meddled, not once? Especially when it came to the god of secrets and trickery. Yes, there was no doubt in Kerr’s mind, Jadis had a divine hand resting on her shoulder.
At least it kept making things interesting.
Regardless, whether a literal god was throwing shit at Jadis or not, that didn’t mean that Jadis had to deal with that ass-pudding in the most fucking idiotic way possible! Challenging someone so much higher level than her just because they’d been a little rude was ridiculous. Kerr was way ruder on a regular basis and Jadis didn’t ever try to throw down with her. They just had rough sex and moved on with their lives, like normal people. What the fuck had she been thinking? Getting into it while out in the field was a stupid idea, but that didn’t mean Kerr wasn’t going to give the giant-sized dope a piece of her mind. In a strange twist, however, Aila seemed to have less reservations than her for once.
“You know how lucky you are he didn’t seriously hurt you, right?”
Kerr’s ears perked up at Aila’s words as the group charged across the broken fields. After the ill-advised spar, their little team had packed up early and headed back to Far Felsen. There was a lot of tension in the air, most of it coming from a clearly shame-faced Jadis, so Eir had politely suggested they return to the city and regather their composure.
Kerr wasn’t much for temples or priests, but she could appreciate a sensible little slut like Eir. She had a good head on her shoulders and knew when it was best to back off and regroup, a trait that Kerr herself didn’t always share.
Running back to Felsen, Aila had maneuvered to be the one of the five who rode on a Jadis body alone. That had been intentional, so it seemed, as Aila was not waiting until they got back behind city walls to talk about Jadis’ moronic behavior.
“He wouldn’t have killed me,” Jay replied to Aila’s question, speaking loud enough to be heard over the clank of armor but softly enough that her words were clearly intended only for Aila. Jadis really did not seem to get that other races had way better hearing than her. “It was just a spar.”
“It was not ‘just a spar’, Jadis. You got into a fight for no reason! Why? What does it matter that he pointed out something you’ve never cared about before? Why care about his opinion at all?”
“I just—” Jay hesitated, clearly struggling to find her words. “I just felt like I had to, okay?”
“Why?”
“Because.”
“Because why?”
“Because he pissed me off!”
That last was said loud enough that everyone twitched in response. While it didn’t bother Kerr overmuch, she could tell that stepping into an argument between Jadis and Aila was definitely not something that the others were comfortable with. That they were all technically being carried along by Jadis while she simultaneously fought with her girlfriend was a whole new level of awkwardness, too. Ah, to be as ignorant as the chatter mouth Sabina.
Aila didn’t respond to the outburst. She went all silent and cold in that way that just made Kerr want to pinch her ass or something to make her react. But the silent treatment could be effective, she supposed. Letting the big brute fester for a few minutes could be the right call. Kerr wasn’t quite ready to jump into the conversation, so she let the two simmer.
Eventually, Jadis was the one to break the silence.
“Even if I did get hurt, Eir would have healed me,” Jay grumbled petulantly.
“What if he’d decided to take an arm, to teach you a lesson? Eir can’t replace lost limbs. Even if there’s a priest with that capability back at the temple, would you really want to have to go through that?”
Jadis was silent to that point. Aila continued a second later anyway.
“What if he had done more damage to your weapons than he already did?” she said in that matter-of-fact tone of hers. “You’re going to have to get a whole new weapon for Syd now, but what if he’d broken Jay and Dys’ weapons, too? Sabina’s going to have to repair that dent you did to yourself on Syd’s back plate, which will cost time and resources. But he could have ruined your armor. All that silver and time would have been wasted.”
Jadis’ silence continued.
“What about how we feel?” Aila continued, her tone almost imperceptibly softer. “We told you last night it was a bad idea to start a fight with the man. We told you to back out after you challenged him. We’re your partners, remember? If we see a danger and tell you to avoid it, then you walk blithely into it anyway, completely disregarding our advice, how are we supposed to take that? How am I supposed to take that?”
Shit. Kerr didn’t think Aila was the type to make an emotional appeal but by Svaroga’s pock-marked ass, she had a way of pointing out the truth.
“You’re right,” Jay finally responded, her voice both tight and contrite. “I was a total asshole back there, wasn’t I?”
“A smidge,” Aila confirmed dryly.
“Sorry.”
“It’s alright,” Aila said. “This time. But if you keep making dumb decisions like that when you’re being given good advice, don’t expect easy forgiveness again.”
Kerr smirked to herself at the words shared between the two. She knew there was a reason why she liked the freckled mage and the three-headed giant. Well, other than the good money. And the great experience. Or the amazing sex. Okay, there were a lot of reasons why she liked them. But one of those reasons was because they weren’t stupid. Jadis could make some very stupid decisions, but unlike the many true fools she’d met along her travels, Jadis at least had the sense to recognize when she was wrong and do something about it.
There was a far less tense silence between the two after that, which spread to the group as a whole. There was even some talk between the others as they neared the city about what to do with their afternoon now that it was suddenly free. A trip to a restaurant seemed to be in order, which sounded good to Kerr. She could use a drink after the morning they’d had. Though in her opinion, dropping off the nasty-smelling demon eyes to collect the bounties on them needed to come first. Nothing soured a meal like the smell of demon rot.
Before they quite reached the city, Kerr overheard one more exchange between the two.
“Do you want to talk about why Noll upset you so much?”
Jay didn’t respond immediately to Aila’s question, but not in an angry way by what Kerr could judge. She seemed to be really thinking about it.
“I don’t know,” Jay eventually told her. “It was just a gut reaction. He got under my skin and I felt like I had to fight him. When I think about it, I’m not even sure why his words revved me up so much. I just… I don’t know. The impulse was just there.”
In Kerr’s opinion, it was because Jadis had thought her cock was bigger than it was. Which was saying something, because she had a pretty fucking huge cock, but that wasn’t the point. Kerr had seen it plenty of times in the past. Young aspiring warriors who had gotten some success under their belts beating their peers in spars and contests. They always acted like they were the top shit because they let a little success get to their heads. Then, inevitably, they’d challenge someone in the tribe with some actual experience and learn a valuable life lesson. Or they got dead. Depended on how stupid they were and who they challenged.
Jadis had accomplished great things for someone who’d, according to her, just shown up less than half a year ago. Ulya’s tits, just getting to her current level so fast was a feat unto itself. If Kerr had done the same, she’d probably feel like she had balls the size of anvils. Which was, now that she thought about it, a sensation she could kind of say she had experienced thanks to Jadis.
Speaking of, Kerr absolutely wanted to get her dick back. Practically speaking, it just didn’t fit in her pants so she couldn’t walk around with it. Not that she cared if people saw that she was packing, in fact that could be a whole ‘nother level of fun. But the discomfort of trying to shove her new equipment into leather pants not meant for that kind of load had been too much of a bother to deal with.
So. How was Kerr going to convince Jadis to give her mega meat back to her while also telling the colossal dope that she’d been wrong and Kerr had been right? The opportunity presented itself as they arrived back at the city gates and all were ushered inside.
“Hey, uh, sorry I was kind of a dick back there,” Dys told Kerr.
Kerr smirked as she heard Jadis quietly repeating her apologies to Thea and Eir a little distance away.
“I didn’t mean to ignore your advice,” Dys continued. “I let my temper get the better of me, and I’m sorry.”
“Hmm,” Kerr hummed. “Remind me, would you big stuff? What was it that I told you?”
“That I needed to call the spar off because Noll was going to kick my ass.”
“And what did Noll do?”
“…Kick my ass.”
“Others may find the practice beneath them,” Kerr grinned at Dys. “But me being me, I do not deny myself the pleasure. I fucking told you so.”
“Yeah, you did,” Dys sighed without resentment. “Again, my bad.”
“Since we’ve established that you were in the wrong and it was indeed your bad,” Kerr continued as the group walked down the street, “I suppose you’ll just have to make it up to me.”
Dys gave her a sidelong glance, one pale eyebrow raised. She was clearly treating her with suspicion, which Kerr found to be entirely unfair. When had she ever been unjust?
“How would you like me to do that?”
“Why, I think the only appropriate recompense would be letting me have a go at that lily-white ass of yours,” Kerr told her while rapping her knuckles against the metal encasing that gloriously perfect rear end.
“Oh really?” Dys grinned down at her, her violet eyes dancing with mirth. “First, I get my ass kicked today, now you want to fuck it too?”
“It’s really the only fair thing for you to do,” Kerr commiserated in an understanding tone. “Rough, I know, but it’d be pretty fucking dishonorable of you if you didn’t offer your ass up to me after being such a cunt earlier.”
Dys chuckled, then leaned her head back before replying.
“And what about the others? Should I offer them the same?”
Kerr shrugged.
“I don’t fucking care. That’s up to them to ask for their compensation.”
Dys laughed, showing off that brilliant smile that Kerr loved to see.
“Fine, it’s a deal. We’ll settle up tonight, as long as you convince one of the others to be on the receiving end for the ritual.”
“Like that’ll be hard,” Kerr scoffed. “Your devoted priestess would let you fuck her on the temple altar if you asked.”
After that, Kerr continued to banter with Dys until they got back to the guild hall. As a group, sans Sabina, they stripped out of their armor and put away their gear. As they got cleaned up and dressed for an afternoon lunch on the town, the sight of Aila naked from the waist down reminded Kerr of another bit of business she had to attend to.
The precious pervert still had that thick cock swinging between her long legs. They’d been interrupted that morning, but Kerr wasn’t going to just let that sexy little moment go unfinished. Besides, Aila deserved a reward for how she’d handled Jadis after the pointless spar.
Kerr was happy to be the one to give it to her.
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